Categories: DivisionDivision DSpring

We Goin’ Sizzler – Week 7

Let me start by saying I love my wife very much… Division D week 7 is here. The playoff picture changes every week and this week is no different. Many surprising results put teams in the middle of the pack, while other blowouts helped teams solidify their spots near the top. We also had some excellent individual performances, proving that one person can carry a team.

Without further ado, let’s get to the sizzle!

The Johnny Utah: We begin with one of the aforementioned surprising results. TRISTAN HETU-FRANKEL went 16 for 23 for 206 yards with 6 TDs and 0 INTs as MEAN GIRLS surprised KISS MY END ZONE 37 – 18. This is their second win in a row as MEAN GIRLS look to be making a push for a playoff spot, they currently sit in 11th spot. Meanwhile KISS MY END ZONE continue to Yoyo and drop all the way to 10th spot.

Next, we have the Rod Tidwell: DYLAN GARBER had 10 catches on 10 targets for 69 yards and 4 TDs as TRAPSTARS edged out HOT SAUCE SPORTS 25 – 19. DYLAN scored 24 of his team’s 25 points, did not miss a target and got the W for his team. This performance helped get TRAPSTARS back on a winning track and propels them all the way up to 4th spot. HOT SAUCE SPORTS, on the other hand, lose their third game in a row and drop to 8th spot.

The Earl Megget goes to NIKKI PAPICH who ran 6 times for 66 yards and 1 rushing TD as THE NEW GUYS bounce back with a 32 – 21 win over VOODOO. NIKKI added a solid 4 throwing TDs and puts his team into a four-way tie for top spot. With their third loss in a row, VOODOO drop to 9th spot.

On defense, the Stefan Djordjevic goes to rookie SÉBASTIEN ANDJO who had 2 INTs this week. SÉBASTIEN added a receiving TD as the performance helped LES BLUES BRANLEURS secure the 20 – 14 win over TOPSZN. This is only LES BLUES BRANLEURS’ second win this season and they sit in 10th spot. TOPSZN had their two-game winning streak broken and drop to 7th spot with the loss.

The Bobby Boucher: JEFFREY LEFEBVRE had 4 SKs and limited the opposing QB to only two TDs as THE STOICS valiantly defeated LOCKDOWN 30 – 12. JEFFREY is usually racking up the stats offensively but this defensive performance helps his team get the win and jump up in the standings to 7th spot. With the loss, LOCKDOWN drop further down the standings into 12th spot and seriously risk dropping out of a playoff spot.

Lastly, the Becky ‘Icebox’ O’Shea for best 2-way performance goes to JUSTIN LERNER who had 5 catches on 8 targets for 51 yards and 3 TDs. He also added 2 INTs and a PD on defense as TOUGH LUNGS smoked BALLIN 60’S 39 – 6. The win puts TOUGH LUNGS in 6th spot with a difficult schedule ahead. With the loss, BALLIN 60’S sit dead last at 14th spot.

My pick for Game of the Week was an offensive master class as VULTURES cooled off JOHNNY FIREBALL 36 – 34. Both QBs had 5 throwing TDs, while BENJAMIN MCMAHON had no trouble running the ball, ÉDOUARD LEROUX struggled. ÉDOUARD relied heavily on receiver GUILLAUME ST-JEAN while BENJAMIN had both JAMES DRYSDALE and KEVIN DONNET step up. JOHNNY FIREBALL kept it close with FÉLIX D’AOUST’s 2 SKs but in the end KEVIN DONNET’s INT was the difference maker in this one. With the win, VULTURES move up to 2nd spot while JOHNNY FIREBALL drop to 3rd spot. Watch for a possible rematch deep in the playoffs.

The CFL started this week and it was full of surprises. Brady Oliveira got the surprising start for Winnipeg and did not disappoint with 22 rushes for 126 yards. Oliveira’s first pro start was a beauty. Equally impressive, the Ottawa Redblacks’ defense stepped up for the surprising win over Edmonton. Lastly, rookie QB Nathan Rourke came into the game for the BC Lions and had a decent game, throwing two TDs. With starting QB Michael Reilly still questionable, Rourke can be a solid prospect going forward. Montreal Alouettes only play week 2 vs Edmonton, hoping Vernon Adams Jr. can pick up where he left off in 2019.

Now, for Teoli’s FPF Almanac 2021.

BLACKOUTS [5-2-0] vs PARDON MY SWAG [5-1-0]

Last week, BLACKOUTS lost their second game of the season. More surprisingly though, they only managed to score 12 points. PARDON MY SWAG are on a five-game winning streak but also struggled last week. BRAD EVANS is already over a thousand yards throwing but he has been sacked 13 times. On the other side, BLACKOUTS’ RYAN VANSLET already has 11 SKs this season. Unfortunately, this is a recipe for disaster, BLACKOUTS win.

AROUCH [5-1-0] vs FIGHTING ILLINI [3-3-0]

AROUCH have won five games in a row and, after last week’s win, I am finally ready to stop making excuses for these guys. They are the real deal, ERIC LALONDE and company have yet to throw an INT this season, 8 different receivers have been into the endzone, 4 INTs and 11 PDs defensively, and a name that makes me hungry. FIGHTING ILLINI laid a goose egg last week and are struggling for consistency. AROUCH win big.

THE LEFTOVERS [2-5-0] vs PD’S AND NEGRONIS [0-7-0]

THE LEFTOVERS are back to losing and are yet to hit a winning streak. Fortunately, they are the best of the worst and they play another bottom dweller this week. THE LEFTOVERS win before going back to losing.

TOPSZN [3-3-0] vs TUTS AND PARLAYS [4-2-0]

TOPSZN are coming off a loss, have a decent record, but they really haven’t beat anyone of substance. TUTS AND PARLAYS are coming off an easy win, have a decent record, and have beaten some contenders. It might look close on paper but give me TUTS AND PARLAYS to win big.

CLINKERS [2-4-0] vs LOS SIETE AMIGOS [4-2-0]

CLINKERS finally found their offense last week, scoring 4 TDs in the win. LOS SIETE AMIGOS have lost two in a row, and this, after having a four-game winning streak. If VINCENT MARQUIS can get open, I will not be surprised if CLINKERS win this game but I am just not confident they will show up. LOS SIETE AMIGOS win a low scoring game.

KISS MY END ZONE [2-3-1] vs VULTURES [6-1-0]

KISS MY END ZONE are the most inconsistent team in this division and a lot of that has to do with their lack luster defense. VULTURES are on a five-game winning streak and show no signs of slowing down. BENJAMIN MCMAHON will have a field day against a team with only one sack this season, VULTURES win easy.

TOUGH LUNGS [3-2-1] vs JOHNNY FIREBALL [5-2-0]

TOUGH LUNGS are a mid-table team that can easily get into the playoffs and surprise some teams. They have not faced a team like JOHNNY FIREBALL this season. JOHNNY FIREBALL get back to winning this week and put points on the board. TOUGH LUNGS should take notes in this one, as it is a possible playoff match up.

REPLACEMENTS [0-5-1] vs BALLIN 60’S [0-6-0]

REPLACEMENTS are coming off a tie and have their first point of the season. Not officially out of the basement yet but the ropes are loosening and the back door is open. This remains a game between bottom dwellers; the winner will have a slim chance at making the playoffs, the loser will finish dead last. REPLACEMENTS win?

GLOGANG [3-2-1] vs MEAN GIRLS [2-4-0]

I had the pleasure of seeing GLOGANG play last week and they are a decent team; OLIVER SURI is an aggressive defensive presence and they have a well-balanced offense. After losing their first four games, MEAN GIRLS are on a two-game winning streak and looking good. TRISTAN HETU-FRANKEL is throwing darts with already 20 TDs this season. This game could go either way, give me MEAN GIRLS to continue their winning ways.

SPERA’S LEGION [2-3-1] vs THE STOICS [3-3-0]

Another close one here, THE STOICS bounced back with two wins in a row while SPERA’S LEGION are coming off a tie and a loss. Two similar teams heading in opposite directions, something’s got to give. THE STOICS always manage to keep it close and I think their defense will win this one.

TRAPSTARS [4-2-0] vs LOCKDOWN [1-4-1]

TRAPSTARS win this one big! I just hope they use the game to spread the ball around because if they keep going to DYLAN GARBER I see an early playoff exit.

BRUINS [6-0-0] vs HOT SAUCE SPORTS [3-3-0]

This was supposed to be a game of top contenders when the schedule came out, The BRUINS have delivered so far, HOT SAUCE SPORTS not so much. HOT SAUCE SPORTS have lost three in a row but if anyone can surprise the mighty BRUINS, it is these guys. Shut down ZACH ZWIRN and ALEXANDRE ST-ARNAUD, force GABRIEL WISEMAN to throw over 10 yards and test his arm strength. If WILLIAM POWER can jump the routes and get the INTs, HOT SAUCE SPORTS have a chance. BRUINS win by one!

THE NEW GUYS [5-1-0] vs LOYOLA [1-5-0]

THE NEW GUYS win this on big! After a stumble, THE NEW GUYS got back on track with a win. They have hopefully learned their lesson not to take the bottom dwellers lightly and will show up for this one. LOYOLA are coming off their first win and just one more win might be enough to get into the playoffs!

VOODOO [3-4-0] vs LES BLUES BRANLEURS [2-4-0]

VOODOO have lost three in a row and look more like shape-shifters than contenders. LES BLUES BRANLEURS stumbled out of the gate but have been holding their own lately. VOODOO just hasn’t had the defensive performances to stop LES BLUES BRANLEURS’ offensive game. LES BLUES BRANLEURS win by six.

Playoffs, we talkin ‘bout playoffs!

Let’s take a week 7 look at the playoff picture.

Conference A:

  1. BRUINS (6-0-0)
  2. VULTURES (6-1-0)
  3. JOHNNY FIREBALL (5-2-0)
  4. TRAPSTARS (4-2-0)

BRUINS remain in 1st place of Conference A and it looks like a win this week can solidify their spot. VULTURES continue to jump up the standings and sit in 2nd place. JOHNNY FIREBALL drop to 3rd and need to turn things around quick. TRAPSTARS manage to climb up into 4th place. Look for the top 4 to stay the same as all teams are expected to win.

Conference B:

  1. AROUCH (5-1-0)
  2. THE NEW GUYS (5-1-0)
  3. PARDON MY SWAG (5-1-0)
  4. BLACKOUTS (5-2-0)

Technically a four-way tie, things will definitely change before the end of the season. AROUCH take over 1st place and continue to find ways to win. THE NEW GUYS drop to 2nd for now. PARDON MY SWAG jump up to 3rd and can hold on with a big win this week. BLACKOUTS drop all the way to 4th need to find their game soon.

Looking forward to week 8, the game to watch, statistically speaking, would have to be BLACKOUTS [5-2-0] vs PARDON MY SWAG [5-1-0] August 12th 7pm Laval (2). Although, I would not be surprised if BLACKOUTS run away with this one.

Until next week, remember I love my wife. Pain Heals. Chicks Dig Scars. Glory Lasts Forever.

Frank ‘Falco’ Teoli