We Goin’ Sizzler – Week 5

Lots to talk about this week 5 in Division D, there were some surprising results to recap and the playoff picture is becoming clearer. Not all teams have played five games so we will leave the mid-season review for next week. As always let’s start with the individual accolades.

Let’s get to the sizzle!

We begin with the Johnny Utah: We have a new comer into the league by the name of RAPHAEL MAJOR. In his first FPF game ever, he balled it out, going 17 for 24 for 216 yards and 6 TDs. More importantly, RAPHAEL was able to pick up a win for AROUCH over VOODOO 39 – 30. AROUCH have three wins this season but this is by far their most impressive win, they sit in 4^th spot. VOODOO, on the other hand, drop to 6^th spot.

Next, Rod Tidwell: JAMES DRYSDALE had a monster game this week catching 8 of 12 targets for 93 yards and 3 TDs. 12 targets, that means he was closely watched on the later catches but he still managed to bring them in, as VULTURES came out with the 34 – 29 win over THE STOICS.

In the same game, the Earl Megget goes to BENJAMIN MCMAHON, yes him again! BENJAMIN ran 10 times for 100 yards. Hitting triple digits is very impressive but 10 running attempts shows that the opponent did not have an answer for this running QB. VULTURES are 4-1-0 and sit in 3^rd spot, THE STOICS are 1-3-0 and drop all the way to 11^th spot.

On defense, the Stefan Djordjevic goes to TIM HORNER who had 3 INTs this week. TIM had three of the team’s six INTs as THE NEW GUYS absolutely crushed CLINKERS 39 – 12. This game was never close as THE NEW GUYS put up 26 first half points.

This week’s Bobby Boucher: For the second week in a row, GABRIEL WISEMAN. He pressured the QB for 3 SKs, 1 PD and forced 2 INTs. The BRUINS continue to roll as they pick up the easy 32 – 13 win in this one over BALLIN 60’S. GABRIEL is a big part of their success as he seemingly is able to do it all.

Lastly, the Becky ‘Icebox’ O’Shea for best 2-way performance goes to ALEXANDRE BLAIS who had 10 catches on 13 targets for 77 yards and 3 TDs. He also added 3 INTs and a PD on defense. A much-needed performance as LOCKDOWN narrowly defeat MEAN GIRLS 26 – 20.

Talking about last week’s predictions, my picks for Game of the Week were not on point as THE NEW GUYS easily defeated CLINKERS and TOUGH LUNGS won by 10 over HOT SAUCE SPORTS, an upset that I called. However, it was still a week filled with excitement as two top dogs were handed their first loss of the season.

GLOGANG 27 – JOHNNY FIREBALL 26, JOHNNY FIREBALL kept it close thanks to their defensive play but offensively they just couldn’t keep up with GLOGANG.

BLACKOUTS 24 – FIGHTIN ILLINI 25, BLACKOUTS’ three defensive TDs were not enough as JULIEN LACHANCE uncharacteristically had three INTs of his own.

Finally, I had made one more prediction that unfortunately did not come to fruition. I am a man of my word so here you go!

Now, for Teoli’s FPF Almanac 2021.

THE NEW GUYS 4-0-0 vs PARDON MY SWAG 3-1-0

This is a tough one to call, both teams are very talented and coming off strong performances. If we compare QBs, PARDON MY SWAG’s BRAD EVANS is more responsible with the ball than THE NEW GUYS’ NIKKI PAPICH (3 INTs vs 7 INTs) but NIKKI is a better runner. Defensively it will be PARDON MY SWAG’s JORDAN MCINNIS vs THE NEW GUYS’ TIM HORNER (5 INTs each). Give me PARDON MY SWAG for the win in a close game.

HOT SAUCE SPORTS 3-1-0 vs KISS MY END ZONE 1-2-1

Another close one here as KISS MY END ZONE have been all over the place this season and HOT SAUCE SPORTS are coming off their first loss of the season. If WILLIAM POWER plays rusher in this one, I see him shutting down MATHIEU DOMON’s run game and forcing mistakes. Give me HOT SAUCE SPORTS to bounce back with a win.

TOPSZN 2-2-0 vs CLINKERS 1-3-0

CLINKERS are just not firing on all cylinders this season averaging 12.5 points per game. That is just not good enough against a TOPSZN team that puts up 23 points per game. Look for HASANI WORRELL to pressure MARC-ANDRÉ DESAULNIERS into making mistakes. TOPSZN win.

FIGHTING ILLINI 2-2-0 vs PD’S AND NEGRONIS 0-5-0

FIGHTING ILLINI win this one big as PD’S AND NEGRONIS are still locked in the basement. KEVIN SMUDA will give his QB a short field to play with and it will lead to many TDs.

MEAN GIRLS 0-4-0 vs REPLACEMENTS 0-4-0

Both teams are locked in the basement and don’t deserve any spotlight here. I’ll flip a coin. Tails, REPLACEMENTS win.

SPERA’S LEGION 2-2-0 vs TOUGH LUNGS 2-2-0

Both teams are coming off wins so expect a very exciting game. SPERA’S LEGION’s VINCE PISANO is averaging 8.8 yards per pass which is no surprise as this team has a very west coast vibe. The problem is that TOUGH LUNGS’ OLIVIER DOLEYRES has 9 SKs this season and he will pressure VINCE into throwing some INTs. Still SPERA’s LEGION find a way to get it done.

BALLIN 60’S 0-4-0 vs VULTURES 4-1-0

VULTURES win this one by a lot. Look for KEVIN DONNET to get some long balls and stack up on his stats.

THE STOICS 1-3-0 vs GLOGANG 3-1-0

THE STOICS have been within a score in all three of their losses so I expect another close game here but what do they need to do to come out on top? CHRIS RIVEST needs to have 0 INTs and DENZEL EADIE-LOWE has to dominate both sides of the ball. GLOGANG cannot settle with PDs defensively and have to show the sure hands to bring in the INTs. So far, only OLIVER SURI has proven capable. GLOGANG win a close one.

JOHNNY FIREBALL 4-1-0 vs LOCKDOWN 1-2-1

JARED GALLANT will have a big game for LOCKDOWN as usual but it just won’t be enough to keep up with JOHNNY FIREBALL and their high scoring offense. Look for FÉLIX D’AOUST to get to the QB early and often in this one as well, JOHNNY FIREBALL get back to their winning ways and win easily.

LOYOLA 0-4-0 vs THE LEFTOVERS 1-4-0

Two teams that belong in the basement here. THE LEFTOVERS escape thanks to their week 1 win but both teams have lost four in a row. Still, THE LEFTOVERS are the better team in this battle and will come out with the narrow win.

VOODOO 3-2-0 vs BLACKOUTS 4-1-0

VOODOO’s FRANK KAYE will have to continue his stellar play at QB in this one. It will be difficult if he continues to only look at ANGELO GAROFALO as BLACKOUTS will be watching him closely. BLACKOUTS bounce back in this one with MICHAEL KHAZAKA having a big defensive game.

BRUINS 4-0-0 vs TRAPSTARS 3-1-0

BRUINS are the only undefeated team left in Conference A and have been rolling comfortably so far. This may be their toughest test as TRAPSTARS are on a three-game winning streak. If JOSH NAIMER can step up offensively, TRAPSTARS have a chance in this one. Give me BRUINS to win a close one.

LOS SIETE AMIGOS 4-0-0 vs TUTS AND PARLAYS 2-2-0

Sure, LOS SIETE AMIGOS are undefeated but they have not impressed in their last two games. TUTS AND PARLAYS are an experienced team lead by DANIEL LAZZARA who are still looking to click defensively. I think it happens this week.

LES BLUES BRANLEURS 1-3-0 vs AROUCH 3-1-0

With both teams coming off impressive wins last week, this is a tough one to call. LES BLUES BRANLEURS seem to have a QB controversy, if they decide to stay with new guy MINH TON-THAT, I see them turning things around. AROUCH also have a new QB RAPHAEL MAJOR who is coming off a monster game. Being seemingly matched offensively, I have to go with the better defensive team, give me LES BLUES BRANLEURS.

Playoffs, we talkin ‘bout playoffs!

Let’s take a week 4 look at the playoff picture.

Conference A:

1. BRUINS (4-0-0)
2. JOHNNY FIREBALL (4-1-0)
3. VULTURES (4-1-0)
4. GLOGANG (3-1-0)

BRUINS take over first place in Conference A and look like they will stay there. JOHNNY FIREBALL drop to second and show that they are not invincible. VULTURES jump up to third and will stay there with an easy game this week. GLOGANG make their way into the top four but have a tricky game to deal with this week. HOT SAUCE SPORTS will be hoping someone drops points so they can make their way back into the top four. TRAPSTARS have a very difficult game but they can climb the table with a win.

Conference B:

1. THE NEW GUYS (4-0-0)
2. BLACKOUTS (4-1-0)
3. LOS SIETE AMIGOS (4-0-0)
4. AROUCH (3-1-0)

THE NEW GUYS take over top spot but for how long? BLACKOUTS drop to second but I wouldn’t be surprised if they get back to the top by next week. LOS SIETE AMIGOS jump up to third but can they remain undefeated? AROUCH surprise and rise to top four, they will be tested this week. PARDON MY SWAG will be hoping it’s their time to rise with a big game coming up. VOODOO are nowhere to be found and can continue to drop.

Looking forward to week 6, the game that seems most intriguing is THE NEW GUYS 4-0-0 vs PARDON MY SWAG 3-1-0 (1^st seed vs 5^th seed). You can catch the game July 29^th 7pm at Laval (1).

Until next week and the mid-season review, Pain Heals. Chicks Dig Scars. Glory Lasts Forever.

Frank ‘Falco’ Teoli