The Other Half of Co-Ed 3 Report Cards!
I guess it is time AGAIN!!! I hope people enjoyed the first report card that went out! Now I have some catching up to do and get some grades out to the rest of the division! Due to my bye week I’ve taken a small sabbatical from FPF, so I’m excited to see how things have shaken up and who has been winning in my absence! Last article, I couldn’t fit in my SCOTT’s TOTS, so they will be #1 on my agenda this week! With 2 weeks off of a “real” article, I’ll have tons to catch up on next week, so stay tuned to a big ol’ recap coming up! I’ll be able to take a look at who is inching closer to those awards we all love so much and what our playoff picture will be looking like!
I’m not sure if I just wasn’t paying attention… but the elimination zone for playoffs seems to have EXPANDED!? I was pretty sure only 5 teams weren’t making the playoffs, and that maybe the top 4 would get a bye, meaning the lower 12 or so teams would have at least 1 playoff game, but looking at the playoff breakdown this week – I THINK I’VE BEEN BAMBOOZLED! Out of 21 teams for Co-Ed 2, only 12 TOTAL will be making it to the playoffs. Seeds #1- #4 will still get a bye week as I suspected, but the playoffs will only be 4 rounds:
DIVISIONAL ROUND
5 v 12
6 v 11
7 v 10
8 v 9
QUARTERFINALS:
1 vs Lowest Seed
2 vs 2nd Lowest Seed
3 vs 3rd Lowest Seed
4 vs 4th Lowest Seed
SEMIFINALS:
1 vs Lowest Seed
2 vs. 2nd Lowest Seed
FINALS:
Semi-Final Winners
So good luck making it to the postseason! It has just become a more exclusive party! As a quick reminder for the guidelines of how I usually do report cards: I separate teams performance into 3 categories – OFFENCE / DEFENCE / and OVERALL grades. My grades go from S tier down to C tier, because realistically no one wants to see an F…. it just hurts! Usually, I’m able to see a trend in scores and know how many points per game a team needs to score to win, but this division is all over the place this season so I will refer to my default FPF Ideology for “lower divisions”:
Offensively, I believe a team should be putting up 4 TDs per game if they want to secure a win, or at least have the best chance at winning a game. Anything less than 4 TDs and you begin putting more pressure on your defence to not only make stops, but also come away with a turnover or 2. So, in these report cards, you will receive a higher grade for CONSISTENTLY putting up more than 24pts a game. This will obviously hold true for judging my defensive performances as well. If I expect the offence to be able to put up 4 TDs per game, I have to expect defences to be able to PREVENT 4TDs per game! I find this is a much harder task, especially as you move up in divisions, but still believe most teams can achieve this! With usually 4-6 possessions for each team per game, your team essentially has to make 1-2 stops on defence (and limit offensive turnovers) to be successful. Finally, I balance all of this with the difficulty of your schedule! If I feel like you’ve fallen a bit short of my milestones, but you have what I perceive to be a harder schedule, then I may keep or boost a grade slightly, while the same is true for the inverse.
So without further ado, let’s get to subjectively grading each of your teams and players:
REPORT CARDS:
MICHAEL SCOTT’S TOTS
Late, but never forgotten, we start these report cards with my team of MICHAEL SCOTT’S TOTS! The Office being my favourite show, it’s only natural that I bring my favourite people along for the ride on our FPF journey! The TOTS have been around FPF for some time and in many iterations, but this time, we are making our first appearance in Co-Ed 2! David De Andrade is popping into the TOTs for the first time as honorary QB and is doing a great job so far (obviously very biassed)! In 4 games, the main man has put up 16 TDs and has been spreading the ball to all players on our offence – I may have the most receiving TDs on the team (4), but I’m not really leading in any other category! Ex-QB and current offensive superstar, Kenny Boutilier, is leading our team with 140 yards and is keeping up with 3 TDs. Pair that with Chloe Brazeau-Gelinas and Cristina Ionescu’s 20 targets and 3 TDs each and we have been able to find a decent recipe for success! We stumbled a bit against AT LEAST WE TRIED AGAIN a few weeks ago, but have been fairly consistent at putting up 4+ TDs per game.
On defence I’ve been dragging my feet a bit and have only managed 5 sacks so far, but, my team has been able to rally behind me and come up with some big plays! Jonothan Joseph has been an excellent staple to our TOTS lineup, and has been able to make some big tackles and INTs to turn games around! Cristina and David have also come up big defensively with a handful of INTs themselves, and even Kinza Hart, new addition to the team has been able to come up with a much needed INT in our game against CHEFS BANDITS! Overall, our defence has been able to keep most teams to under 4 TDs throughout the season and we are hoping to continue the trend! With a mixed schedule of harder and easier teams, we are obviously looking to win out the rest of our season!
OFFENCE: A+ DEFENCE: S- OVERALL: A+
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BACK THAT PASS UP
I have to say, I’m a bit shocked that BACK THAT PASS UP aren’t doing better than their current 2-3 record! There are a lot of big names that I recognize here: Jason Rossie, Justin Anania, and Chris Brockwell to name a few! Obviously, Jason has been heading this team at QB and has done a great job picking up 10 throwing TDs and 3 Rushing TDs in his 4 games played! With 5 games played so far, it’s a bit odd to see only a handful of receivers that have made 5 or even 4 games played! Justin Anania has been the top receiver so far due to his attendance and great performance – 4 TDs and 227 yards receiving with 34 targets is amazing! Unfortunately, that’s where the offence begins to dip a bit… no other receiver has over 100 yards receiving, or 20 targets, or more than 2 TDs. Chris Brockwell has 2 TDs in 12 targets, and despite having the next best yards (77), Jasmine Rossie only has 1 TD recorded in 16 targets! With only 2 games where they scored under 3 TDs, they are usually able to score 4-5 TDs per game! So how are they losing?!
Defensively, they have been a mixed bag of success as well. Despite scoring 34 points against WHO’S CARRYING THE BOATS, they allowed 35 points that game and were given the L. Also, when their offence struggled against LES RANCEURS, so did their defence. Jasmine Rossie has been killing it on defence – 3 INTS, 2 of which were returned for a PICK 6 – and is leading this squad in almost every defensive category! They haven’t been able to pick up as many sacks as some other teams, so I wonder how much pressure they have been able to place upon opposing QBs while switching between rushers. However, besides WHO’S GONNA CARRY THE BOATS, they have been able to keep other teams usually to 2 TDs. It will take some bigger offensive performances to be able to bring in those wins because their Defence is doing all they can to hold it down! A more consistent showing from some of their players should help them because they absolutely do not have an easy end to their schedule, playing some of the best teams in the division.
OFFENCE: B+ DEFENCE: A- OVERALL: B+
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BALLS AND DOLLS
Tyler Cousins isn’t new to the QB position in FPF and has been the QB for TEXAS WHALES for a few seasons now – he may be struggling now in Co-Ed 2 with only being able to put up 11 TDs in 4 games (6 of them coming from 1 game). I was able to catch some of this team when they were playing against LE ROI DES CARTES and I was happy to see the intensity that they brought to their play! Chazz Pisanelli is currently the offensive leader with 6 TDs, despite not having the most receiving yards (Elio Cariglia has the most yards with 214). Tyler seems to be able to spread the ball somewhat, with Olivia Stewart coming in with 17 targets, but the rest of the receivers seem to all have less than 10 targets each, making it easier for defences to cover their key receivers. They had been struggling as a unit to score more than twice a game until their most recent match against SHOW ME YOUR TDZ – where they scored a whopping 41 points!
On the flip side though, they haven’t been able to consistently keep other teams down. Chazz once again finds himself at the top of the leaderboards for his team defensively with 3 TDs, but he isn’t alone in the INT department. Jade Henderson has come down with an INT of her own and has been holding it down with a handful of tackles! Andrew Kwan-Dilollo has been pretty consistent at getting an average of 1 sack per game and will need to continue that trend to give his defence as many chances as possible to turn over the ball! Currently, their opponents have been able to control the game and have been scoring 30ish+ points a game! They don’t have a SUPER hard schedule to end the regular season, but it will end up being difficult if they don’t find a way to keep scoring like they did in the last game, and finding a way to cause more turnovers on defence! Good Luck!
OFFENCE: C+ DEFENCE: C OVERALL: C+
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HOT WINGS
HOT WINGS is another team full of new players to the league who are still trying to find their footing! They currently find themselves at the bottom of the pile in the elimination zone, but a silver lining is that they haven’t scored the least amount of points in the division and 1 or 2 of their games have actually been pretty close to ending in their favour! William Denis has been their QB for the first half of the season, and I’d assume he will continue in that role! He has been able to put up a great amount of Rushing yards, but despite this, has not been able to be as successful with throwing the ball. Together, he and Laurent Boileau have only been able to throw 9 TDs, but have given up 11 INTs and 11 Sacks combined. Louis Moisan HAS been doing his best to hold it down on the offensive side of things, but being unable to score more than 2 TDs per game has stifled the HOT WINGS’ ability to keep the pressure on their opponents each game. They will need to start spreading it to more than just Louis (who is leading the team with an astounding 48 targets over 200 yards receiving), if they want to be more successful on offence.
Although their defence started off on decent footing, in the past 3 games, they have allowed more than 5 TDs per game! Both Florence Couture-Senecal and Marie-Josée Fiset are doing their best and have each recorded 1 sack, but with only Laurent Boileau and William Denis creating turnovers with their 3 combined INTs, they haven’t been able to create very many extra opportunities for their offence to score. They have had a mix of opponents which has made their whole experience a tough one for their first outing, but I love that they are still giving it their all and should have a few easier games as the season comes to a close.
OFFENCE: C DEFENCE: C+ OVERALL: C+
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KAMIKAZE
One of our last undefeated teams left, KAMIKAZE have yet to play one of the top 5 teams, but will get their chance this weekend against MEAN MACHINES! Gabriel Lemonde has been really effective at giving his team opportunities to win games by scoring 17 TDs in their 4 games played, all while keeping INTs and Sacks to a minimum! Jean-Sebastien St-Arneault and Rachel Shea both boast 4 TDs each, while Maxime Verna-Gagne is close behind with 3 TDs. Everybody else on the offence essentially has a TD in their name, which is always great to see since they have shown little difficulty with getting the 4 TDs a game that I’ve asked for (only faltering against the BULLS surprisingly). Another nice surprise is seeing the vast number of female players that have played so far: Out of the 8 receivers who have recorded a catch this season, 5 of them are female!
Just like their offence, I’m also intrigued to see how successful they have been on defence – In their 4 games so far, they have yet to allow a team to score more than 3 TDs! Jean-Sebastien St-Arneault has been explosive as the top rusher in the division and has 6 more games to go! At his current pace, he could be looking at a 25+ sack season (please slow down…. I have records to maintain…)! All jokes aside, this is an amazing showing and a great way to create turnovers for your defence. Maxime Verna-Gagne and Angie Toporowski have been able to capitalize on a few of them, while Joanie Choinière-Émard and Rachel Shea are picking up any slack with their ability to be everywhere on the field, getting tackles. Overall, the rest of their schedule should work in their favor, and as long as KAMIKAZE can get by MEAN MACHINES, they have a good chance of finishing the season UNDEFEATED!
OFFENCE: A+ DEFENCE: S OVERALL: S-
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KISS MY HUGS
The once SHERIFFS, now turned HUGS, have come together with a mix of old and new faces and find themselves 3-2 at the midpoint of the season! Frank Kaye has been trying to work his magic and give the KISS MY team a VOODOO-like performance – with mixed results. It seems as though their offence has flip flopped between scoring big and then scoring low every game. Big man, Devin Daoust, has been the #1 target for this offence, and I can say I expected that much since Devin is a well known and experienced snapper that has a set of great hands! Followed up by the Dubois’, Erica and Alexis, who each have 2 TDs and 4 TDs respectively, they make up the top 3 receivers for this core. I will say though, with big Co-Ed names like: Jeff Brown, Abigail Cockerton, and Kelly Lalonde, I’m a little surprised that they haven’t been able to score a lot more than they have. Despite scoring 5(+) TDs in 2 of their games, they also have 2 games where they only put up 1 TD.
Regardless of how I think they SHOULD be doing, the HUGGERS have been able to put the pressure on most teams they’ve faced, and only given up more than 4 TDs once! Jeff Brown leads the team with 3 INTs and 6 PDs (a great performance in 5 games), but Alexi Dubois has been proving that he can seriously be a Jack of all trades when it’s needed. He has recorded 20 tackles (more than double his next teammate), 2 INTs, 2 PDs, and a sack! He can do it all! Despite this, both MEAN MACHINES and WHO’S GONNA CARRY THE BOATS were able to shrug off any of their attempts at control and score some big points! With 3 of the top 8 teams coming up in their schedule, how many of them will they be able to win, and will their defence be able to continue keeping teams to low scores? Can’t wait to get some HUGS this week as they take on the TOTS, so GOOD LUCK, and see you soon!
OFFENCE: B DEFENCE: A+ OVERALL: A-
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LA SECTE
LA SECTE is another team that I’ve seen around in Co-Ed before, and having played against them a few times, they have shown an ability to make big plays and contend with some of the better teams of the division. Unfortunately, they seem to be struggling a bit this season and after 5 games, have only found 1 win. Nicolas Katerelos is taking his place at QB, returning after a successful season in Co-Ed 3 where LA SECTE went 8-2 and made it to the semi-finals! Nicolas has been able to score 20 TDs in 5 games, which should be well enough for them to be winning more games than they have, so I had to take a closer look as to what was going on here. First thing is, Nicolas seems to be able to spread the ball and get at least a handful of receivers involved: Alyson Francillon, Marie-Belle Monchamp, Elyse Bourdages, and Estelle Quevillon-Lemay all have at least 10 targets each, all of them have at least 1 TD, and Estelle Quevillon-Lemay and Elyse Bourdages both have around 100 receiving yards! However, their biggest offensive player by far is Justin Leblanc-Guindon. With over 20 targets, 301 yards, and 7 TDs, he seems to be carrying this offensive unit and doing his best to lead by example for this offence.
So, I look at the defence. And here is where I believe they can afford to tighten up a bit / focus their energy! Despite scoring 4 TDs (or close to it) in a few of their games, their defence has been unable to keep their opponents down to less than that. But it isn’t for lack of trying! Cumulatively, they have been able to force 9 INTs and 9 PDs, but have not been able to put up great sack numbers, or get any PICK-6’s. Zachary Robledo is currently leading with 3 INTS and 3 PDs (so 33% of their defensive stats), but they will have to do a bit more if they are going to want to be able to win those close games like those against LES RANCEURS and CHEFS BANDITS! Their schedule doesn’t get any easier, so I worry that they may not be able to climb out of the elimination zone in time.
OFFENCE: B DEFENCE: B+ OVERALL: B
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LES GRANDS CHUMS
This is a new team for me! I don’t recognize many of the players on the roster, and it seems as though a good portion of them are new to the league. Despite their newness however, they seem to be having a decent season and have been able to stay out of the elimination zone even with its recent expansion! Louis Brassard has been able to use his legs a little bit – bringing in 1 Rushing TD, but otherwise, has been focusing on his pass game with very few turnovers! Even though it seems that his favourite receiver is currently Alexandre Charlier, who has 26 targets and 169 yards, it’s actually Cindy Hardy who is leading this team in TDs! Looking at their recent games played, I’m impressed as to how successful they have been against some great teams: Yeah, they lost to KAMIKAZE last week, but they almost beat NO PUNTS INTENDED, losing only by 1 point! I’m hoping the offence isn’t losing steam since they’re going from a big start to the season, to now scoring less than 4 TDs per week. With 2 big games this weekend I’ll be looking to see if they can turn things around and keep up their trend of 31 points scored.
Defensively, KAMIKAZE is the only team to be able to score 4 TDs on them, which is saying something when you’ve had NO PUNTS INTENDED on your schedule already! Thomas Brassard is having a superstar performance with 4 INTs, 5 PDs, and a PICK-6, and if it wasn’t for Louis Brassard’s PICK-6, Cindy Hardy would be the #2 defensive pick for this team with her 2 INTs and 2 PDs! Overall, I think this team is doing big things and performing well. They seem to have enough athletes to force some turnovers and score on offence, but are having trouble overcoming some tough teams! Let’s see if they can start things off with a bang during their 2 games this week.
OFFENCE: A DEFENCE: A+ OVERALL: A+
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LES RANCEURS
I played against LES RANCEURS in our first game of the season, and I liked the way this team played! They were competitive, skilled, and I saw that they had the potential to be big threats had we played them later in the season. Since then, they have beaten most of the competition that stands in their way (save for TONIX), and are chilling in the #10 spot of the division. Giovani Antonacci has been running up and down the division and has accumulated over 200 rushing yards so far; and though he has thrown 13 TDs, he has had some trouble limiting his turnovers and has put up 11 INTs. His main targets seem to be Eric Namts, Kyle Martel, and Zoe Zervoudakis, all of whom have over 100 receiving yards! They haven’t been able to consistently put up 4 TDs, but have been able to sneak out the wins regardless!
Vanessa Raposo has been doing her best to put some pressure on her opponents and has come away with 3 sacks so far! However, it’s Eric Namts who i’ll give another shout out to for being the #1 defensive player with 4 INTs and 3 PDs. I do enjoy seeing how many female players are getting involved in the defence and hope it does continue. At the pace that LES RANCEURS are going, I don’t know who else in their schedule will be able to beat them! They have MEAN MACHINES and WHO’S GONNA CARRY THE BOATS at the end of the season, but if their games against TONIX and LA SECTE prove anything, it’s that this team can hang with the best of them! I think by the end of the season, we may be seeing LES RANCEURS push their way into the top 5.
OFFENCE: B+ DEFENCE: S- OVERALL: A
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MEAN MACHINES
Burt Reynolds and Adam Sandler are smiling upon this iteration of the MEAN MACHINES. Christophe Desroches has taken the spot of Paul Crewe at QB, though it seems Xavier Parent has stepped in for a few games to keep the flow going! Both of these QBs have been doing a great job so far and together have brought in 25 TDs! They have been able to meet my quota of 4 TDs a game and half the time are batting above that! This might be one of my favourite offensive rosters to look at due to the great amount of parity between receivers and just how many of them are female receivers! Marilou Grenon is currently leading with 194 yards and 5 TDs, Xavier Parent is slightly behind that with 180 yards and 4 TDs, while Élodie Martel and Emmanuelle Desroches are basically stat twins with 15 targets, 80ish yards, and 4 TDs each! Which isn’t even mentioning the other receivers that have multiple TDs. Anywhere you look, this offence has threats, and is incredibly difficult to cover!
I’d like to say that everyone is having the same kind of performance on the defensive side of things, but there is a clear defensive leader on this team: Xavier Parent. This isn’t to say that the rest of this defence are a bunch of couch potatoes, but Xavier Parent is not only the #1 defensive player on the team, but also the #1 defensive player of the division! With 11 INTs, 7 PDs, and 4 PICK-6’s, he is hogging all the attention for his defence. As a side note, MEAN MACHINES has also been fairly successful at picking up some sacks, though shared between 3 different players. In conclusion, for a 5-1 team, they are on the correct path and should just continue doing what they are already doing!
OFFENCE: S DEFENCE: S+ OVERALL: S
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TIGHT ENDS
The TIGHT ENDS are doing what they can to stay in the postseason and find themselves on the edge of the elimination zone. Unfortunately, they have had a hard time not turning over the ball. With more INTs than TDs, Eric Carpanzano is doing his best to lead his team to the playoffs, and has been putting the work in with his legs! With 309 Rushing yards and a Rushing TD, Eric has been one of the more prolific runners of the season. His receiving core has relied heavily on Jordan Carpanzano and Taylor Osborne, who have had far more targets than the rest of the team. However, they also have 7 other receivers who have recorded a TD which makes me believes that Eric is spreading the ball when he can. Although they haven’t always been able to score more than 3 TDs in a game, when they have, they have won – so the key will be: how do they work their offence to score the necessary 4 TDs to win.
Unfortunately, even if they do figure that out, their defence will still need to do some work to limit how many points they allow their opponents to score! With Eva Tzanetakos and Emily Dias bringing in 5 combined sacks, and the team only having a combined 7 INTs, they seem to be limited in the amount of turnovers they have been able to cause! Pair that with the fact that they have had to face some really strong teams in the first half of the season, and you can see the reason why they have struggled a bit! They definitely need to up their aggressive level of play to ensure that they can keep teams to under 30 points, while also forcing the offence to take more risks. I’m looking for more PDs and more tackles! If they can go 2-2 in the rest of the season, I can see them barely making it out of the elimination zone!
OFFENCE: C DEFENCE: B- OVERALL: C+
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WHO’S GONNA CARRY THE BOATS
Last, but definitely not least: WHO’S GONNA CARRY THE BOATS have been stomping up and down the division, making a name for themselves. After a brief run of having games finishing within 1 point, this team has decided enough is enough, and has been blowing teams out of the water! Alexandre Szalipszki is doing an amazing job in all departments. He has 5 Rushing TDs along with his 23 throwing TDs, and usually I would make a comment about his 11 sacks, but it doesn’t seem to be stopping him at all! With all of these TDs going around, it’s amazing to see that not only does this team have multiple receivers with 3+ TDs, but they also have one of the top receivers in the division: Kayla Gauthier!!! Kayla is on a tear this season and has accumulated a whopping 42 targets, 309 Yards, and 7 TDs! Putting her in the #2 slot out of all receivers in the division!
On the final flip side of things, Jenna Araujo has been able to come out with 4 sacks in her 5 games played, which is a decent ratio for any rusher. 3 players on this team have been able to find their way into the endzone for PICK-6’s: Michael Major (who leads in INTs), Simon Duchesne, and Clement Billard! They have been able to do a decent job at keeping their opponents in check, with only 2 teams being able to score more than 4 TDs on them, and finally being able to tie the ever elusive TONIX! I was always a believer that someone would be found to carry the boats – and boy, do they carry it well! I can’t wait to see what this team has to offer in the playoffs!
OFFENCE: A+ DEFENCE: S- OVERALL: A+
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ZACK’S FANTASY TEAM OF THE WEEK (WEEK 6):
QB (1): Nicolas Katerelos (LA SECTE) – 23 Attempts / 14 Completions (60.87%), 171 Yards, 6 TDs, 0 INT, 1 Sack // 5 Rushing Attempts, 56 Rushing Yards, 1 Rushing TD
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WR (1): Julien Pacheco (LA SECTE) – 3 Targets / 3 Receptions (100%), 55 Yards, 3 TDs
WR (2): Geraldine Cabillo-Abante (NO PUNT INTENDED) – 9 Targets / 7 Receptions (77.78%), 73 Yards, 2 TDs
WR (3): Maxime Verna-Gagne (KAMIKAZE) – 10 Targets / 8 Receptions (80%), 56 Yards, 2 TDs
WR (4): Célestine Chartier (TONIX) – 5 Targets / 4 Receptions (80%), 46 Yards, 2 TD
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DB (1): Xavier Parent (MEAN MACHINES) – 5 Tackles, 2 INTs, 2 PDs, 2 TDs
DB (2): Christian Otenga (LES RANCEURS) – 2 Tackles, 2 INTs, 1 TD
DB (3): Thomas Brassard (LES GRANDS CHUMS) – 2 Tackles, 1 INT, 1 PD, 1 TD
DB (4): Joyce Généus (THE BLACK WOLF) – 1 INT
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RUSHER (1): Hugo Lépine (TONIX) – 1 Tackle, 5 Sacks
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GAMES OF THE WEEK:
I guess last week the division was just conspiring against me to make me look bad, because I almost had another perfect week of predictions! I get it, another tie to keep me on my toes, and I for sure could NEVER have seen this one coming! Either way, we are back on track and, with slightly over 40 games left in the season to predict, I’m hoping to finish with about 60 correct predictions. Let’s take a look at who I chose this week:
TIGHT ENDS vs KISS MY HUGS
BALLHARD UNIVERSITY vs WHO’S GONNA CARRY THE BOATS
LA SECTE vs BULLS
BALLHARD UNIVERSITY vs BACK THAT PASS UP
TIGHT ENDS vs BALLS AND DOLLS
MEAN MACHINES vs KAMIKAZE
THE BLACK WOLF vs LES GRANDS CHUMS
MICHAEL SCOTT’S TOTS vs LES GRANDS CHUMS (YOU KNOW THE DRILL…)
Prediction Record: 30-12-2
We did it! We finished the Report Cards! Week 6 is in the rearview mirror and we are quickly heading to the end of the regular season. Only 4 weeks remain so, if there are upcoming milestones you want me to cover, don’t be a stranger, let me know! If you want to see more accurate info about your teams, your players, your rivalries/history – send them to me (It helps when I know about you)! Also, check out the new episode of Calling the Audible – the official FPF podcast – available on Youtube and …. Probably somewhere else too. And always keep a look out at FPF’s Official Instagram page for updates and exclusive content!