D-Boys and DK renew their acquaintances – FlagPlus Football League

Often while I am typing my article, my clever, yet sometimes overly astute girlfriend will note that I only type with three fingers. My left index finger operates the left side of the keyboard, my right index finger controls the remaining keys and my thumb is used uniquely to punch the space bar. I type remarkably quickly considering this awful form. It has resulted in my amazing companion sending me a daily GIF of a cat pounding down on a keyboard.

Typing is a useful skill that is likely fading in its prevalence as people become more comfortable typing with 2 thumbs on a cellular phone. In that way I’m somewhat avant-guard in my style. That or, well, I was just too lazy to learn to type properly. This got me thinking of other skills that have gone by the wayside or are slowly becoming endangered.

The bar room argument was an amazing skill developed by aspiring orators. These discussions were often fueled by several rounds of liquid confidence. Now, we simply look up whether Bill Paxton or Bill Pullman delivered that incredible speech in Independence Day. [1] Smart phones are great but I loved arguing sports stats with friends while knocking over the icy insert for pitchers at Cage aux Sports. I mean the employees of the establishment are happy that I can no longer break several pint glasses with one fell swoop.

I do miss making and receiving mix tapes. It is pretty cool to never have to carry a device outside of one’s cellular phone, which is on us 24/7 anyway. This has me excited for the future. Keys are no longer a necessity as doors to homes and cars can be unlocked by proximity to one’s telephone. Domino’s can now be ordered without speaking to another human and Amazon can pretty much deliver anything you need in two days flat.

We still lack real hover boards, flying cars, the ability to travel through time. But it’s a truly exciting time. Moore’s law expects that technology allows for the evolution of technology to continually be developed faster than in previous years. It has been predicted that this will eventually reach a point of saturation where such growth isn’t possible. This may send us into a Mad Max-esque dystopian future where desert gangs and factions rule over all based on their ability to control access to gas. I on the other hand hope that it allows me to have a jetpack, watch FPF games in real time on an upcoming and award winning FPF app and stream it directly on my 96-inch 4D TV.

DK Learn the D-Boys are Slicer-Dicers

I do hope that Rochdi Benabdelkader is enjoying his time in the beautiful Dominican Republic. I can imagine he is surrounded by many a mami on the beach. That said, DK, as led by Pat Chénard, was not quite the same this week. So while I do hope Rochdi comes back rested, his teammates are probably saying “Oye papi, te necesitamos coño, quando tu regersa?”

Nonetheless, Pat Chénard did well in relief of Benabdelkader. D1/2 podcast host went on to say of the game: “Chénard fed Alex Pilon!” [2] This of course had me puking at his typical lack of perspective and general obvious observations. I digress…

For DK, the absence of Serge Pilon Jr. hurt, as it always does when you’re missing a top tier player. Chénard was fairly effective, having thrown for three touchdowns in a game where he completed 12 of 19 pass attempts. Alex Pilon scored two touchdowns on passes and another on an interception while Tam Vilaydeth scored another.

Simon Dagenais dropped another nugget: “Marco Masciotra is so much better in spring than winter.” [3] Let’s examine this level of idiocy for a moment. Again, I apologize for the digression but I can’t let it go; I just can’t. Are we to believe that Masciotra is highly affected by Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)? Does the D-Boys quarterback know of this diagnosis? Perhaps Dr. Dagenais can go on to prescribe some Prozac or light therapy? I guess we can attribute D-Boys’ slow start to not living in California. Unfortunately for them, FPF is based in Montreal. Given that, I don’t think we’ll see the team settle down south!

I will say that D-Boys have gotten off to a much slower start than I anticipated this weekend. The aforementioned poster boy for SAD did throw two interceptions in this game. In reality, all of Marco Masciotra’s interceptions this season have come on fairly uncommon circumstances. Two of the interceptions have come on Hail Mary passes and another (to Alex Pilon, as aforementioned) was on a deflected pass on a miscommunication between Anthony Comeau[4] and Theo Ojeaha. Comeau would make up for this as he led the team with 6 interceptions. Meanwhile, Theo Ojeaha scored two touchdowns on the day while Jamal Gittens would not be outdone; he scored two touchdowns for D-Boys in Week 3. In a game that started with Antonio Lanni completing 2 of 3 passes and earning a first down, D-Boys would go on to win 32-26 over DK.

Gene Kelly Left without Song

If you’re Ryan Kastner (Ranimakers QB), you wake up on game day (or Rain Day as I imagine he calls it) and visualize your first drive. A quick pass to get into the game, followed by an intermediate strike to get past midfield, and then a wide open post to the back of the end zone to open the scoring. This would not be the case as the Rainmakers began the game by using four plays to gain 0 yards. Kastner looked as frustrated as Charlie Brown who had to witness Lucy pulling the ball away.

Conversely, Alex Nadeau-Piuze connected with brother Samuel Nadeau-Piuze on his first past of the game. This would be a recurrent theme akin to Lucy’s Psychiatric booth in Charles Schwartz’s Peanuts comic strip. Samuel Nadeau-Piuze caught 8 passes for 106 yards, and 6 of those catches were scores. FMS appear not to have Mikhail Davidson’s commitment for the season and Antoine Pruneau has yet to grace Flag Moi L’Sac with his presence. The result has been playing with a small roster. That hasn’t affected them much as they have playmakers all over the field. William Fontaine added an interception to his defensive stat sheet in this game thus proving the depth of this small roster.

Rainmakers did see five scores as Derek Kastner, Guy Laflamme, Teddy Frenette [5] would each score a touchdown while Bobby Mikelberg caught two touchdowns. There were moments where the Rainmakers defense looked like they would hold as with two plays remaining in the first half, they were able to prevent a score. This kept the score tied at 19.

Flag Moi L’Sac went on to score to start the second half and complete a two-point conversion. This did lead to a strange decision as Rainmakers would score on the following drive and complete a one-point conversion which would take the score to 27-26. Flag Moi L’Sac attempted another two-point conversion that would have ended the game prematurely. This was an interesting set of decisions and shows how volatile the game can be and how quickly decisions regarding converts can be made. The turning point was a bad interception thrown by Ryan Kastner that would put the game out of reach. A garbage time touchdown would bring the game to a close with Flag Moi L’Sac beating Rainmakes by a score of 40-33.

Keyser Soze Shows The Men of Will What Will Really Is

The Usual Suspects had an addition that may have gone somewhat under the radar. It’s hard to believe that the addition of Antonio Lanni would go relatively unnoticed but it will be noted from henceforth as he caught five of Rick Nincheri’s passes where one was a touchdown and in typical ragdoll fashion, threw his body around en-route to two PDs and five tackles.

Tam Vilaydeth brought along fellow member of the Terrorship of the Ring, Pat Jerome. Jerome definitely had an impact on this game. He had 6 catches for 73 yards and a touchdown. Jo Duclair even provided Vilaydeth with an extra possession with an interception in this game. However, Suspects rusher Hinsley Adams proved to be a thorn in Tam Vilaydeth’s side all game.

It was not merely that Adam had two sacks on Tam Vilaydeth, whose mobility usually keeps him safe from rushers. Hinsely Adams put enough pressure to keep Tam Vilaydeth off balance all game. Usual Suspects quarterback Rick Nincheri had issues as well as this truly was a great defensive game. However, Nincheri was able to connect with Antonio Lanni, Andrew Carruthers and Jonathan Grizzley for touchdowns. This would be one more touchdown than Terror Squad as Usual Suspects would go on to win this game 18-12.

What is in a Name If the Name Has No Number?

Michael Asate suited up for #NR this week. His impact was huge and could scarcely even be measured by traditional means. Also, he wasn’t wearing a number and got no stats. Therefore, it is truly impossible to measure his impact. Believe me however, it was huge!

This was one of the best games of the season thus far. A week after I criticized Corey Pecker, he made me look like a buffoon (granted, it’s not difficult). There were moments when Pecker looked timid, however this dissipated quickly as he moved to his right and shot-putt a ball to Jordan Moses in the middle of the field. Moses grabbed the ball with one hand and turned up field, never breaking stride for the opening score of the game.

Served with Ice took the ball and Jordan Panetta looked deep, connected short and intermediate. However, it was his legs that would tie this game as he broke containment and ran, spun, turned and juked his way to the endzone on a great run on SWI’s opening drive. He and Corey Pecker both threw ill-fated intercepted balls on the convert attempts and thus, after two scores, the game remained as it was at the coin toss. Except for the stats mind you; stats are what this is all about is it not?

The following drive saw many of Pecker’s well placed wobblers hauled in by Jeremy Anderson. Served with Ice defenders were quick to the ball but, #NR were happy to gain 4-5 yards per down. Once past midfield, Corey Pecker guided a ball into the wide open and waiting arms of numberless Michael Asate. On the ensuing convert, Jordan Panetta jumped an ill-advised cross body throw to return it for the 1 point that would bring the game to 12-7.

The game’s fast pace took a sloppy turn as a missed snap and a failed fourth attempt would end the next SWI drive. Referee Walter Berry would even end up receiving the pig skin in an area more suited to pleasing lovers and creating life. I did say this drive would end sloppily. This seemed to only bolster the confidence of #NR as Corey Pecker put up another deep pass to Troy Trench who pulled it in from the sky after beating his defender on a clean post route.

The half seemed as though it would end in a two-score lead for #NR. Jordan Panetta, the man derived from many baked goods, would toss up a quick throw-back to Leandre Pichette. Pichette looked deep and chucked it up in the middle of the endzone to Mikhail Davidson who just simply decided that no player on the field would jump as high as he could. Davidson hauled it into his body and this allowed the second half to come to a close with a 19-13 scoreline.

With Served with Ice getting the ball back to start the half, it seemed like a foregone conclusion that they would, as the more reputable franchise in Division 2, take control of the game and come away with the victory. #NR has forever lived as the underdog in FPF. As such, the script began to take fold as many imagined it would Jordan Panetta was making a mockery of #NR rusher Deemy Feelgood to start the half. Buying time, Panetta launched the ball into the back corner of the endzone and Simon Losier would haul in the pass and keep both feet in while adding to the score. This narrative would momentarily continue on to the next drive where a pass fired from Corey Pecker over the middle of the field was deflected by Travis Moses who reached behind himself to try to make a play. It hung in the air as Wylie E. Coyote did once running off a cliff before dropping into Jordan Panetta’s hands.

At this point Deemy Feelgood showed that he is one of the true leaders of this #NR team. Having learned Panetta’s tendencies, he began to break down and shadow Jordan Panetta and forcing him to throw from uncomfortable platforms (think of the Trump Family at any point during the inauguration). This would result in a turnover on downs that would turn the game on its head (whatever that means). Pecker would make up for lost time by completing a pass to Dariusz Goliebowski and a touchdown pass to Travis Moses.

Served with Ice would answer as a deep strike followed by an incredible toe-tapping catch by JD Chevalier. A failed convert would keep the game at 26-25. Corey Pecker would pick SWI apart on the next drive and, despite a tipped pass, Jordan Moses would hold on to it and step out of bounds on the 4 yard line. The next play was a quick slant to Jeremy Anderson who shielded defenders with his body and after the convert this would bring the game to a close at its final resting place of 33-25 in favor of #NR. For those who want to see the whole game, it can be seen in our Facebook group or at https://vimeo.com/201218598. Shout-out to new FPF cinematographer Lance Daniel who did a wonderful job with this game!

Are They Not Merciful?

The first time I saw Vinny Gualano play quarterback I thought to myself ‘Here is Joey Taylor 2.0’ (from Two and a Half Dans). Vinny took it as an insult but I truly meant it as a compliment. You do not need to do things traditionally to win in FPF. Gualano will never be the guy who sits in the pocket and delivers. He is however, a great athlete who can throw on the run, off his back foot, while being dragged down by rushers.

This game was an example of how good Vinny Gualano has become as an FPF quarterback. Gualano went 21/32 for 220 yards and 6 touchdowns while not turning the ball over in this game. Even with Gladiateurs rusher JP St.Pierre getting pressure for much of the game and even turning in two sacks, Gualano would not be fazed[6] . He did take the sacks and showed poise throughout the game while avoiding turnovers throughout.

François Lebeau of Gladiateurs would not be outdone. Of Lebeau’s 42 attempts, 23 were completed and 5 went for touchdowns. Two of those touchdowns were distributed to Marc-André Brochu while the remaining touchdowns went to Alex Nadeau-Piuze, Nicolas Guimier, and Simon Rhéaume. However, the downfall for Lebeau and the Gladiateurs was a redzone turnover on downs. This allowed the game to finish 47-32 in favor of Grip n’ Rip in a game that was otherwise very close.

Grip N’ Rip got two touchdowns from Jamal Gittens, two from long time gripper Anthony Da Silva, one touchdown from Anthony “Blood Sport” Vendrame and another one from Matthew Da Silva. Perhaps this has been Vinny Gulano’s greatest achievement as he continues to spread the ball and use all of his threats. We will see how Grip N’ Rip handle CLR Forces in their upcoming challenge.

Division 1 Power Rankings

Montreal’s Finest (3-0): Their greatest point differential has been no more than 10 points so far this season. They are undefeated, but will they continue to win such close games?
Flag Moi L’Sac (2-1): FMS had an impressive win. Their small but versatile roster has been difficult for opposing teams to deal with this season.
DK (1-2): DK stays at no. 3 despite the loss. I don’t want to overreact to a loss without Rochdi Benabdelkader. They played fairly close guys without a quarterback and Serge Pilon Jr.
D-Boys (1-2): D-Boys finally get a win but they seem sluggish to get off blocks. This team seems to have taken the regular season for granted.
Loonatics (2-1): Ranked second in Division 1 but 5th in my power rankings may seem bizarre. I will say that this team has their ups and downs and we never seem to know when the downs are coming.
Got-Skills (1-2): Got-Skills have won or been close in every game this season. Nick Centomo is playing a lot smarter than we’ve seen in the past.
Waste Yout (1-2): I knew this team would have their struggles as the season went on. I expect early season struggles but a late season threat.
Rainmakers (1-2): [7]So far, unfortunately, they’ve followed the script.

Division 2 Power Rankings

Clockwork (3-0): Taking the Division with no appy polly loggy. Clockwork are getting it done. Matt Kirouac looks like his old self having logged six sacks already.
ONS (3-0): Is it any surprise that the top two teams have the top quarterbacks? Nope.
Grip N’ Rip (3-0): Averaging 42 points a game will get you noticed. At this point GnR will not be able to sneak up on anybody.
Braves (2-0-1): A tie game to Chernobyl has the Braves looking slightly human. They scored a mere 25 points in that game. Let’s see if this is more of an exception than the rule.
Dan & Co (2-1): Their loss came in a shoot-out to ONS. I’m not willing to move them down the board too quickly as they did score 45 points in the loss.
Monstars (2-1): Their only loss came in Week 1, in a close game to one of the divisions’ premier offenses. For the moment, I still consider Monstars to be a top tier team.
#NR: I’m starting to see how this team can compete with Corey Pecker at quarterback and with the injury to Kendal Mayers.[8]
STL: A Brent Callender[9] Pick-6 helped lead STL over Chronic Pain in a shoot-out. This team has a lot of talent and Dylan Taylor looks better each week at quarterback.
Incredibles (2-1): A solid start to a team that will more than likely finish near the middle of the pack. Incredibles from weeks 4 through 10: This will be the true test to see how well this team holds up in Division 2.
Chronic Pain (1-2): They have a losing record but last week’sloss to STL was a high scoring affair that could have gone either way.

Others Receiving Votes

Wolverines (2-1):They are 2-1 but two of the wins came against the overmatched EMPS and a Floreani-less Points R’ Us.
Chernobyl (1-1-1): I need to believe Chernobyl will be right by Week 7 or so.

Hungover Visions of the World of Tomorrow

This was a rough week for me I went 1-3 in my Division 1 picks while Simon once again went 2-2. Division 2 was a little easier on both of us as both Simon and I went 6-4. For the meantime Simon made no ground up on the Division 2 picks. We have some differences of opinion this week so it should be an interesting week. Remember you can talk to Simon about his need for counselling by tweeting him @DagenaisFPF.

Division 1	Peeze	Simon

Waste Yout vs. DK	DK	Waste Yout
Loonatics vs. D-Boys	D-Boys	D-Boys
Rainmakers vs. Montreal’s Finest	Montreal’s Finest	Montreal’s Finest
Flag Moi L’Sac vs. Got Skills	Got Skills	Flag Moi L’Sac

Season Total	6-6 (.500)	5-7 (.417)

Division 2	Peeze	Simon

Wolverines vs. Clockwork	Clockwork	Clockwork
ONS vs. Incredibles	ONS	ONS
Chronic Pain vs. Dan & Co.	Chronic Pain	Dan & Co.
EMPS vs. STL	STL	STL
#NR vs. Monstars	Monstars	Monstars
Braves vs. Gladiateurs	Braves	Braves
Points R’Us vs. Wild Boys	Wild Boys	Points R’Us
Terror Squad vs. Served With Ice	Served With Ice	Served With Ice
CLR Forces vs. Grip N’ Rip	Grip N’ Rip	Grip N’ Rip
Usual Suspects vs. Chernobyl	Chernobyl	Chernobyl

Season Total	22-8 (.800)	18-12 (.600)

Friday’s Ferocious Frankfurter

Will Dan Lazzara bounce back against DK? Will Rainmakers reinstate the rivalry against Montreal’s Finest? Are the Incredibles in the same league as ONS? Can the newest team in FPF (Braves) take it to FPF blue bloods (Gladiateurs)? I hate making predictions and analyzing things that haven’t happen yet, so let’s wait a few days to see how those questions will be answered.

For further analysis, tune in to the official FPF Division 1/2 podcast Calling the Audible where Simon Dagenais and Terry Tam discuss the ethical ramifications of the Nintendo Switch will be legit, the very average career of Leroy Hoard, and the benefits of UberLUX. Remember that you can catch the Division 1/2 podcast as well as all episodes of calling the audible by visiting www.youtube.com/flagplus (alternatively, you can return to this article and click the link provided). Feel free to criticize me by reaching me on Twitter @PeezeFPF (as I am on most social media) or by messaging me on Facebook @Peeze Della Reeze.

Have a great and safe week of action. See you at the fields!