Harry, Sally and Something Stranger than Fiction
Paolo Della Rocca
23-07-2021 09:56 PM
Peeze’s Playbook Week 3
Hey folks, this week got the best of me and my idea for the introduction never truly came together. Enjoy the article this week and I’ll pull the idea together by next week.
Memories, Hallucinations and Observations
Not One-trium, Not Two-trium, Not Three-trium
I’ve been critical of Quatrium FFC. Part of the reason is that they forfeited the first game of the season and, quite simply, I hate the sh!t. Secondly, the name is douchey. Yes, this narrative will last all season. However, they do get a partial pass. The reason for this is tha the team rosters one of my favorite players in all of FPF. Vincent Benjamin took snaps at quarterback this week with the absence of Eloise Segeuing. Despite his immense athleticism, Benjamin has rarely quarterbacked in FPF. 20 of his 26 career attempts came in this game.
Number 87 didn’t have a great game by any stretch. In fact there were only 18 completed passes by him and opposing QB Michael Hiotis (Benjamin was slightly better with 10 completions). Hiotis was able to do a little more on the ground as he added 6 rushes, ran the length of the field twice and scored a touchdown. However, the lack of offense was the story for most of the first half. Quatrium started the game with a three and out, Balls Deep would turn the ball over on downs, Vincent Benjamin would complete a 22 yard touchdown pass to Gabriel Manseau. A turnover on downs and an interception rounded out the rest of the half.
The second half saw more offense as Hiotis would score on the aforementioned running play, and Balls Deep would get a score on a pick six by Antonio Venturino. However, Benjamin would score twice with scores to Gabriel Manseau and Patrick Dugas in the second half.
12 Steps to Victory
This is a story about a man named Bobby Spaghettis and his football. Bobby Spaghettis was a man of much experience, endless downs played, and remarkably loose spirals. And his football spiraled even less. Every weekday, for many years, Bobby would catch passes and run routes and find open spaces in defences. Time after time, back and forth, up and down. Every weekday, for year after year, Bobby would affix his flag belt around his waist, thereby preparing for 44 minutes and 10 plays. The football thought the jerseys made his shoulders look broad, but said nothing.
Is Stranger than Fiction? Is it instead that I’m committed to narrating Bobby Sepentgis’ life? Let’s just say it’s a little from column A and a little from column B. After my recent comments about Menace II Sobriety and Sepentgis’ play at the QB poition he sought me out to inform me that he was trying out the position to bail his team out as the original quarterback was not able to fulfil his obligations. That said, Bobby Spaghettis looked much better last week. The target tree was narrow as 15 of 19 targets went to the triumvirate of Jason Noel, Chris Williams and Andrew Dennis Lynch. That said, if it gets you the win, you can’t argue too much with the results. Menace II Sobriety did win this game by a final score of 26-24.
Oscar’s Hockey School has entered their first skid in their franchise’s history. It isn’t the end of the word and it happens to everyone but I can imagine the wind coming out of their sails after losing two straight games.That said, they’ve lost the last two points by a combined 10 points so there’s no reason to hit the panic switch yet. QB Matthew Zeppetelli was relieved in favor of Daniel Curiale. Interestingly Zeppetelli only completed 3 passes but they were all caught for touchdowns. What a bizarre feat. It would appear as though Oscar’s Hockey School needs to build a higher efficiency offense. Hopefully they can install that in time for them to face a red hot Green Means GO! (don’t come at me for confusing colour schemes. I’m colourblind!
Clone Reinforcements Required
When I fall in love, I fall in love hard. You can ask my wife; I likely annoy the hell out of her by following her around the house whenever we’re together. So I fell HARD for The Bad Batch. They have cool jerseys, they are named after a Star Wars property and I love new teams with no expectations. The team expected to have up-and-comer Vincent Malo who has unfortunately only played a single game (against Ravens).
Frederic Dore moved the ball decently well and the duo of Alban Turmel and Antoine Debiens got targeted a ton and they helped matriculate down the field. However, There does seem to be a big play threat missing for the Clone misfits. The Bad Bath did put together 33 plays in a game where there offense seemed stifled.
For Les Mythiques, Etienne Cantin bounced back and they are now 2-2. The team featured Alexandre Jubinville and Vincent Marquis who had an impact with a touchdown and an interception respectively. Still the turning point in the game was a ten yard loss, a sack and a safety when Les Mythiques rusher Gabriel Paquette sacked Frederic Dore. This was one of 4 sacks on the way to a 29-6 victory by Les Mythiques.
So Happy Turfgether!
Save the Turftles (named henceforth as SHT in order to save my autocorrect). Early in the game Sebastien Noel struggled. I attribute this to seemingly being fixated on Vincent Cheung. The two would never find their timing. Essentially if When Harry Met Sally he gave up on her by the time the two crossed paths in the book store, that would have been analogous to this game. It would also have been a much worse movie. It would be Vincent Cheung’s patience that would pay-off and so Sally would wait until he was rewarded with an interception.
Melons were in this game until late. It was tied 18-18 when Leo Diakoumakos made a touchdown saving tackle after a 13 yard connection between STH’s Sebastien Noel to Tony Vo. However, they would allow a touchdown on the very next play when Noel would complete a 10 yard pass to Guillaume Dubois who would score his second touchdown on his last reception of the game. After a risky 2 point convert by Vincent Cheung, Turftles would take the lead 20-18. Matthew Goldberg had 5 more plays to make it right but would not convert on the key fourth down and Save the Turftles would hold on for the win.
Declarations of Bravado
Some teams move up, some move down. It’s all gravity:
- Dilly!Dilly! (3-0): Dilly!Dilly! Is still perfect and haven’t allowed more than 2 scores in any game so far this season. Stan Marino’s TD pace has slowed as he now has 7 touchdowns in 3 games.
- Green Means GO! (4-0): I’m tired of being wrong. GMG is good and improving. Beating the Ravens is no small feat and the was no stopping Eugene McLaren who hauled in 10 of 13 passes thrown in his direction.
- Pincellos (3-1): I didn’t have very high hopes about Pincellos this season. However, I’m man enough to admit I was wrong. I would like to see Jordan Farray be more involved in the offense but you can’t argue with results.
- Suicide Squad (3-1): We all know he familiar names but Tahnyus Steer scored twice on their way to an impressive, blowout win.
- Rainmakers (3-1): Rainmakers finally put up more than three scores and they needed it allowing that many to the Trailer Park Boys.
- Ravens (3-1): A loss this early is shocking. Joel Houle was intercepted three times and Ravens are off to a less formidable start than predicted.
- Blast From the Past(2-2): A blow out win over Oreos is simply impressive. There isn’t another way to put it. They have a huge matchup against Dilly!Dilly! This coming week.
- Oreos (3-1): Ukiah Best was the clear standout in this game. In a losing effort he recorded 2 touchdowns, 5 tackles and a PD. I was surprised by this loss but that’s a great performance.
- Save the Turftles (2-3): After being handled by Ravens, STT have beaten Quantrium FFC an Melons in back to back weeks.
- V-Town (2-1): V-Town took their first loss of the season to Suicide Squad. Matthew Cabral did some damage on the ground but perhaps he was too quick to leave the pocket in this game.
Visions of the World of Tomorrow
Division E is usually a very easy division to pick. However, this season is proving to be very unpredictable. This means the games are good, the division is good and the championship can be anyone’s. As always my picks are in bold. May they embolden you to prove me right or wrong in this week’s games.
Denouement
For those who have any thoughts, commentary or complaints, I am very easy to find. I’m @peezehss on twitter, @pdellarocca and Peeze Della Reeze on facebook. You can also take a chance by emailing me at [email protected] but I don’t check it because it’s a death trap of junk emails all trying to sell me hair and penis growth solutions. I really need to use incognito mode.
Remember that each week you can join the party on our Facebook page or at www.youtube.com/flagplus on our weekly podcast: Calling the Audible. We are still trying to figure out when the shows will be available and how to get it live on air.
Till next week, I want to thank you falettineme be mice elf agin!